I've been going to a dance workshop for a few weeks now. And the hardest thing for me is allowing myself to feel my body.

I have had a bad history with myself and ignoring my body to some extend seemed to be the best way to live a normal life. I'm still not sure what part is trans body disphoria, what part is eating dissorder and if they are even separated. I only know that it took me to some dark places in my life that I don't want to visit again.

As someone who overcompensated with sports and such, I have missed the connection to my body, so I am slowly trying to reconnect.

But it is highly triggering and I have to constantly remind myself that I am allowed to eat. That my body is okay the way it is (not good, not bad. Just existing and doing a good job in keeping me alive). Read More »

#eating dissorder #personal #trans